These are the days of my life
So these next stories might make you laugh your butt off, but this is my life! I have to post these so I remember these moments.
Landon: In May, Becky, our magnificent sitter, text me during school to tell me that Landon told Maggie, "Stop pissing me off." I was floored by this language and immediately was working on how to handle this discussion. When we got home I asked Landon where he heard that word and he couldn't remember. I then said, "Those are dirty words and if you choose to use those words we will have to use soap to wash those dirty words out of your mouth." I was expecting Landon to be horrified and never want to say anything like that again and his reply was this: "Will it be the liquid or the bar soap?" Yep, he was calculating the risk of how bad it was going to be to get soap in his mouth. Ugh!
Carter: We were racing each other in the driveway to see who could win in a running race. He wanted to race me so we got down in our racing stance. He said ready, set, go and we took off. I said to him, "You were fast from the get go." He said, " I was as fast as a gecko?"
Boys: Trying to clean our house is almost impossible because when I finish a task it is simultaneously being ruined behind me. The boys were all playing well together for a hot second so I told them I was going to run upstairs and clean the bathroom. I wasn't there but 10 minutes and 2 out of the three were crying. From the top of the stairs I look down and see all of them at the bottom. Carter immediately says, " Landon did something bad to me and I didn't do anything bad to him." You and I both know that is false. Landon was crying so hysterically I couldn't understand anything so I look at Nolan. I said, "Nolan, why is Landon crying? What did Carter do to Landon?" No joke he takes his hand and pulls his own hair and looks at me. I cracked up! "Carter did you pull Landon's hair?" Carter smiles and knows he just got busted by his 15 month old brother! Priceless
Landon: On a trip to a new park in Strongsville, we were following Matt. Right before we were getting on the turnpike, Landon said he had to poop. I said, "No problem, I'll go up here to Speedway." He was furious that I was going to stop that he said, "Mom, I can hold it for 20 days." I drove to the gas station. I get Nolan out of the car and Carter is standing right next to me and then Landon refuses to get out of the car. I calmly tell him, "You can make a choice. You can get out of the car on your own and go to the restroom so we can go quickly or if I have to come back to get you with Nolan in my arms it might not be as gentle as you would like." He is as stubborn as a mule and just sat there saying "Never". I got him out the car and he literally drug his feet through the whole gas station. Once we reached the disgusting restroom he again refused to use the restroom. Carter and I quickly went to the restroom as I monitored Nolan because he wanted to touch everything (gag me)! I had to put Landon on the toilet where he told me that he wasn't going to go to the bathroom. I said, "You can make a choice, go the restroom now so we can quickly go to the playground or wait as long as you would like and we won't have as much time to play." He looked at me and said, "I'm going to pee on the floor." I immediately reminded him that would be a BAD choice because he would then have to clean it up. No joke, he lifted his penis and sprayed the floor with urine. I stood in astonishment as I was fuming. Testing…always testing me. Follow through with the consequence I reminded my self. I helped him of the toilet to clean up his pee on his hands and knees. Of course this gas station was going green so they didn't have paper towels, only a hand dryer so he was forced to wipe up the pee with 1-ply toilet paper. Don't you know that child didn't cry or yell the whole time I was holding his hand cleaning up the mess. Once the floor was clean, I scrubbed his arms, face, shoulders,etc and we headed to the car. I made him sit in Nolan's car seat which is closer to me. During the remainder of the car ride he unbuckled the top latch of his car seat and repeated over and over in my ear, "I do not like you. You make my life so bad. You are such a mean mom." I took lots and lots of deep breaths as I drove to the playground. When we got there, I turned to him and said, "I know the words that you were saying were meant to make me sad and hurt my feelings but no matter what you say I will always love you. Every day I will love you more and more." Just when I thought the scoreboard read Mom-1 Landon-0 he says, "I know but I still don't like you today." Power struggles are so frequent but worth remembering!
Landon: In May, Becky, our magnificent sitter, text me during school to tell me that Landon told Maggie, "Stop pissing me off." I was floored by this language and immediately was working on how to handle this discussion. When we got home I asked Landon where he heard that word and he couldn't remember. I then said, "Those are dirty words and if you choose to use those words we will have to use soap to wash those dirty words out of your mouth." I was expecting Landon to be horrified and never want to say anything like that again and his reply was this: "Will it be the liquid or the bar soap?" Yep, he was calculating the risk of how bad it was going to be to get soap in his mouth. Ugh!
Carter: We were racing each other in the driveway to see who could win in a running race. He wanted to race me so we got down in our racing stance. He said ready, set, go and we took off. I said to him, "You were fast from the get go." He said, " I was as fast as a gecko?"
Boys: Trying to clean our house is almost impossible because when I finish a task it is simultaneously being ruined behind me. The boys were all playing well together for a hot second so I told them I was going to run upstairs and clean the bathroom. I wasn't there but 10 minutes and 2 out of the three were crying. From the top of the stairs I look down and see all of them at the bottom. Carter immediately says, " Landon did something bad to me and I didn't do anything bad to him." You and I both know that is false. Landon was crying so hysterically I couldn't understand anything so I look at Nolan. I said, "Nolan, why is Landon crying? What did Carter do to Landon?" No joke he takes his hand and pulls his own hair and looks at me. I cracked up! "Carter did you pull Landon's hair?" Carter smiles and knows he just got busted by his 15 month old brother! Priceless
Landon: On a trip to a new park in Strongsville, we were following Matt. Right before we were getting on the turnpike, Landon said he had to poop. I said, "No problem, I'll go up here to Speedway." He was furious that I was going to stop that he said, "Mom, I can hold it for 20 days." I drove to the gas station. I get Nolan out of the car and Carter is standing right next to me and then Landon refuses to get out of the car. I calmly tell him, "You can make a choice. You can get out of the car on your own and go to the restroom so we can go quickly or if I have to come back to get you with Nolan in my arms it might not be as gentle as you would like." He is as stubborn as a mule and just sat there saying "Never". I got him out the car and he literally drug his feet through the whole gas station. Once we reached the disgusting restroom he again refused to use the restroom. Carter and I quickly went to the restroom as I monitored Nolan because he wanted to touch everything (gag me)! I had to put Landon on the toilet where he told me that he wasn't going to go to the bathroom. I said, "You can make a choice, go the restroom now so we can quickly go to the playground or wait as long as you would like and we won't have as much time to play." He looked at me and said, "I'm going to pee on the floor." I immediately reminded him that would be a BAD choice because he would then have to clean it up. No joke, he lifted his penis and sprayed the floor with urine. I stood in astonishment as I was fuming. Testing…always testing me. Follow through with the consequence I reminded my self. I helped him of the toilet to clean up his pee on his hands and knees. Of course this gas station was going green so they didn't have paper towels, only a hand dryer so he was forced to wipe up the pee with 1-ply toilet paper. Don't you know that child didn't cry or yell the whole time I was holding his hand cleaning up the mess. Once the floor was clean, I scrubbed his arms, face, shoulders,etc and we headed to the car. I made him sit in Nolan's car seat which is closer to me. During the remainder of the car ride he unbuckled the top latch of his car seat and repeated over and over in my ear, "I do not like you. You make my life so bad. You are such a mean mom." I took lots and lots of deep breaths as I drove to the playground. When we got there, I turned to him and said, "I know the words that you were saying were meant to make me sad and hurt my feelings but no matter what you say I will always love you. Every day I will love you more and more." Just when I thought the scoreboard read Mom-1 Landon-0 he says, "I know but I still don't like you today." Power struggles are so frequent but worth remembering!
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